Frog Blog: The Adventures of Fratty Frat Froggy: 2011

Friday, June 3, 2011

Alone In The Wilderness!

After my vision with Philip from Survivor, I awoke to find myself alone in the wilderness. I don't know where I am, or for that matter, where anybody is. I worry about my long-lost sister, Franny Frat Froggy, who left home years and years ago. I find myself at the base of a tree, pondering my next move. How will I find Franny? Where will we go? Where will I live? What will happen to my new friends, and even to my wicked owner and her mangy cat? What will happen to the existence of this blog if my readership doesn't pick up soon and I get canceled like my writer's favorite show, Detroit 187? Did Jack Kevorkian really die of natural causes? These, and other stories, next on 60 Minutes!

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Thursday, June 2, 2011

There Is "Power" In The Pink Underwear!

After I left Dollar General with my items bought at "rock-bottom" prices, a vision occurred to me from the heavens above. It was Philip, the secret agent from the TV show Survivor. He explained that he was aware of my plight and wanted to help me. He told me his great-great-great-great grandfather, Whateverhisnamewas, also once had a sister who left home years and years ago. Her name was Forest.

Whateverhisnamewas searched and searched the countryside looking for his sister, Forest. But she was nowhere to be found! He looked high and low, and there was still no sign of her. He knew she had a boyfriend called For The Trees and he went to him. Of course, Whateverhisnamewas found his sister Forest with her boyfriend. He realized then that through all of his searching he couldn't find Forest since she was with him. Hence, sometimes you can't see the forest for the trees!

I expressed thanks to Philip for the help he has given me, although I am not sure how he actually helped. Maybe it was something deeper than led him to contact me. Maybe if I read between the lines I will find out the true meaning of what he was trying to tell me. Maybe there is secret "power of the pink underwear" that will guide me on my journey. Philip used to say "Keep The Faith" or something like that, but he always changed it. Maybe his wisdom will help me. Probably not!

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

I Got Them Dollar General Blues!

I realized that while during all of this commotion concerning my escape, capture, and then re-escape from Cinci The Cat's clutches (not including my owner and her disgusting nail polish network!) the fact I needed some personal items from a local convenience store. Where else to go to than your local Dollar General store! They have all of the right things I need, along with the lowest prices in town! (I sound like a commercial!)

Trouble was how was I going to get there? I summoned up my "ribbit reanimation" one more time to transport me there. You may be wondering if I have this special power, then why can't I just use it to get my long-lost sister Franny Frat Froggy (who left home years and years ago), kill the evil owner and her mangy cat, and also be done with this rabbit I don't trust? Problem is...I can only use it when my writer lets me!

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

I'm a Cold-blooded Vertebrate!

While I have been here, I have recruited my "spy network" with my new friends. "The Frog Catalog" will be helping me to locate my long-lost sister, Franny Frat Froggy, who left home years and years ago (ode to Speed Racer). I feel very safe with my new turtle friends, but it there is something about that rabbit I just don't trust. Could he be a secret agent for Cinci The Cat's Minions? Has he been receiving messages from Philip Sheppard the Secret Agent at Survivor? And I still really don't know about this family? Are they actually the "Evil Neighbors" up the street that I heard about only 20 seconds away? Does that mean my owner is down the block? Was Barack Obama really born in this country? What happened to K-Mart's dominance? Why do all "hicks" walk sideways? The most important question I have: Why are you still reading this? Tune in tomorrow for a startling development...Fratty Frat Has Spoken!

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Monday, May 30, 2011

A "Ribbit" Revelation!

As soon as I totally came to, I realized that I was at the church that my evil owner attends. Through word of my "Amphibian Society", there was another family that goes there that may be able to help me in my quest to find my long-lost sister, Franny Frat. I had caught along a ride with my owner to the church in order to escape her, in which I succeeded. My new family has treated me well, and now I am pondering my next move outside their home on this tree stump!

While I have been here, I have made new friends such as Teddy the Turtle and Roger the Rabbit. It seems that although I can trust Teddy, it is Roger I am not too sure about. Plus there is this big dog that likes to slobber, along with a little one that seems confused why he is here.

This is also my dilemma...why am I here? What to do next? Who are these people? Why does "Dad" here like Jeff Gordon? Why not "hockey"? And these kids, they seem to love frogs...but who knows for sure? Why are "COUPONS" in my head 24/7? And why haven't I mentioned the "Mom"...could it be because she almost drowned me when she soaked me with a water bottle? And again, why all these questions? And, one more time, why do you care? Is it too see what I will do next....or because you love me...or because you were prompted to by a message at "Twitter"? Either way, isn't it nice to be "ALIVE!" Fratty Frat Has Spoken!

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Divine Intervention? Can This Be Frog Heaven?

Where am I? After a long night of interrogation by the minions of Cinci The Cat ("I know nothing, nothing!") which included torture of watching Joyce Meyer episodes, I found myself at the foot of a church. Am I alive? Do I dare venture in? Is this "Froggy Heaven"? Is this a Baptist church? Just how friendly are these fundamental Baptists anyway (pretty friendly, actually!)? Do they eat frogs? Why is the Bachelorette still on the air? Where is my handicapped tag? Is Sylvester Stallone still making movies? Why are you reading this? Do you even care? Maybe I was dropped here at a Baptist church so I can find the Baptismal to have a nice, clean bath! Or maybe, just maybe...I am DEAD! Oh, wait a sec, it is coming back to me....

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Saturday, May 28, 2011

See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil Fantasy Sequence

Since I am now in captivity by Cinci The Cat, I will use my "ribbit reanimation" to speak with the highest members of the Amphibian Society. I will try to find a way to release myself from Cinci The Cat's evil clutches. If I can do this, then I can resume trying to rescue my long-lost sister, Franny Frat. It is my destiny to do so...if I fail, may Bin Laden come back from the dead (if he's dead) and eat my little frog leggies! Fratty Frat Has Spoken!

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Friday, May 27, 2011

Cinci the Cat Caught Me...The Horror!

While I was driving my owner's truck to find my long-lost sister Franny Frat Froggy, a giant cat jumped through the window of the truck and tackled me. I pulled over, and lo and behold, the cat drove me back to my owner's lair. Cinci is a secret agent like Philip from Survivor the TV show. He may have worked with him but no one knows if Philip really was an agent after all! I will plot my next escape as soon as I get away from the evil clutches of Cinci the Cat!

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Fratty Frat Is On The Run!

I have hijacked my owner's truck; on my way to find my long, lost sister Franny Frat. This Garmin GPS I have will help me on my search...if only I could understand what it is! I will use my Fratty Frat instincts as well as my "ribbit radar"! I am so glad to be away from my evil owner. I think I am scotfree but, OMG, what is that....?

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Fratty Frat Froggy Has Escaped!

I've finally escaped from my evil owner's clutches, and I'm on the run! I found out that my sister, Franny Frat Froggy, is locked up at Buchanan Brothers Pharmacy in town...and it is my job to save her! Nothing will stop me until I liberate my sister from the sinister powers that be! Fratty Frat Has Spoken!

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

I'm Starring in My Owner's Video

This is my owner's nail art tutorial video which she allowed me to appear in...actually, she told me if I didn't do it I would be on tonight's dinner table. So, I relented, although I am not too happy about it! Being told I could have been on the menu is not a happy thing! Fratty Frat Has Spoken!

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Sunday, May 22, 2011

My Owner Is a Nail Tech - "I'm Not Gonna Take It Anymore!"

My owner is a nail tech and she drives me nuts! I smell the odors from the nail polish and it makes me want to CROAK! No pun intended...I think it is time I ran away into the "Real World", and not the one on MTV! Fratty Frat Has Spoken!!!

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget

Friday, April 29, 2011

Fratty Frat Froggy Is In The House!

My Name is Fratty Frat Froggy...I live in a very nice house in the Pennsylvania Wilds. I go with my family on many trips and journeys, of which I will document here. This is my court; "The Froggy's Court"! And these are my stories...dun dun!

Blogger Tips - Get This Gadget